Being LONELY at MIDST of SUCCESS...

Loneliness is simply a word sometimes and sometimes it becomes a part of oneself. It is sometimes the worst part…But the question which had always troubled me is that why a person does feels/becomes lonely?

In childhood the parents and the school gathering makes up for the loneliness but as we grow up to be a teenager there are certain things which is just very awkward. There are things that we are unable to define or rather understand. Eventually as we are out of that particular state it’s a very weird situation in front of us. We have crossed our school boundary & is about to reach the graduation section…which is always meant for the matured people.

We laugh at our self, thinking and guessing when did we exactly became MATURE…..But things roll on…we are at that time already heading on towards being something which we always had aspired to be. DREAMS of LIFE we revive and in the long run it becomes only the cause for our survival.

At the time when we are just budding up from the so called teenager to a matured person...We experience the most treasured and the most beautiful emotion of life & that is what we call LOVE…rather in an immature state we earlier used to refer as crush.

With friends we giggle about that person, we are just getting too much attached to that person with the passing time. Slowly slowly we realize that relation is everything but suddenly the young minds bend towards the practicality chooses the MATERIALISTIC TREASURES rather than SILLY LOVE. Rising higher higher is the only DREAM persists that binds the soul towards the ZENITH of MATERIALISTIC SUCCESS.

As we reach higher and higher we become more and more thoroughly engrossed in work and leaving aside so called SENTIMENTS…we move forward. As we SUCCEED towards our GOAL suddenly it’s LONELY. The desired dream of the LIFE has been fulfilled...But still something goes out missing...the person with whom the HAPPINESS can be shared off….

Again led back by LIFE we try to reach up to our OLD FRIENDS whom we have just shunned off while FLYING with SOMEONE in AIR….But sadly they have already moved on…..

LONELINESS strikes again in HEART and this time it’s pretty HARD...so HARD…that we are closed in the CHAMBER OF THE OFFICE working whole day to get a relief from the BURNING THOUGHTS…

Realization and sobs are a regular affair in that state of mind..A grief-stricken heart finds HAPPINESS in the WORK & looses one self in the midst of the same MATERIALISTIC WORLD…

Being a READER....

Books are the best friend of a person was being told by my mom in my childhood. I never really cared to give a thought to the same to understand the true meaning. It was like an additional burden which I didn’t wanted to take above my school books. But at this age, I realize from the heart that I had been wrong in my action towards the books. I felt at first that it’s already too late to start up with new practice. But with an acceptance of my being an ignorant person about the utility of books, I started reading them.

I really feel very poor of myself that I have not read books. Sometimes it’s very shameful to ask about small minute facts that should be known by a reader. Being such a stage of life where nothing new can be started off…I started. It’s a kind of victory for me because patience is a character which I don’t have in myself.

I love writing…though I always fail to understand myself from where do I get such thoughts to write on. Though I write but still why till date I haven’t loved reading. It’s really very uncomfortable asking such question about one self. I believe that a person can start a fresh from any day of the LIFE. Life is so large and huge that it is customized to take such small mistakes in itself. It’s more important that we LEARN.

Though with a slow pace I started reading but with time I have began to gain momentum. Thanks to one of my friends. Sometimes it’s rather important to adapt then to try something new. Being a very fixed character & also a strong personality, it’s sometimes becomes difficult to like digest off the new things. But still I persuaded myself to go for it, rather jump into the huge sea of BOOKS.

Believe it or not, it’s like bringing change in oneself. The personality development I should rather say. Before reading the books I used to think how the people have so much of patience in reading the books. But as I go through the books & the words run down through my heart and my brain…Its really unusual for me to experience such an uncomfortable feeling till I haven’t finished the book.

The feel of having finished of the story is something worth. I just at present feel that I should have started off the reading of the books early in my childhood. Though there is a proverb which is applicable for me “A LITTLE LATE IS BETTER THAN NEVER”

Move forward.....

Sometimes we don’t feel what we have loose some people. By the time they again returns back...we have moved forward. The relationship comes & goes.Every relationship has a cause in life but no relationship is a cause for your life.

But still as we move on in LIFE, we value relationships more and ourselves the least. Feeling low, drooping in the sorrow is the time pass we have with our self. But does it really matter to the person for whom we undergo such a trauma. In the most cases the answer is always a big “NO”.

We forget most of the time that we breathe to live not live to breathe. It’s obvious we have our own sets of problems...with no distinct set of rules to solve it. We live because we have problems in our life.

 A bed of roses is not exciting to live on. It’s the mountains on which we climb on and on and on to reach the peak. It’s the roughness, the crudeness of those rocks which makes us leave our regular route & join the path which leads us to our goals. Nothing exists for a lifelong. It’s difficult to weave an uncertain web which depends on relationships.

Let’s start from the beginning. As we start getting familiar with the term `relationship’ we try to find a relation. Often a regular line is being quoted “WE HAVE COME ALONE, WE WILL BE GOING ALONE”. A person basically desires popularity. I quote what had been said by our History Mam long ago ‘CREATE A MARK...ITS ON YOU WHAT MARK YOU WANT TO CREATE - BLACK OR WHITE..!!”.

The relationships basically acts as the catalyst towards the growth of ages, referred as maturity by most people. This maturity is the result of the relationships on which we believe our existence exists.

But basically the total thing is based on the fact what kind of people we are surrounded with. POSITIVE PEOPLE GIVES POSITIVE STRENGTH. So just let loose off everything – no formality, no vows. Just be YOURSELF so that YOU GROW WITH EACH RELATION IN A POSITIVE WAY.

collectingliquidsunshine: Light of my LIFE

collectingliquidsunshine: Light of my LIFE: We never think of LIGHT – Let it be day or night, the light is always there. It follows from the dawn to morning, afternoon to dusk, even...

Light of my LIFE

We never think of LIGHT – Let it be day or night, the light is always there. It follows from the dawn to morning, afternoon to dusk, evening to night & again from night to dawn…But have you ever felt what would the feelings be when the LIGHT won’t exist? We can’t think of it even in our dreams. We know it’s a gift given by the so called NATURE to us. For me, the same goes on…

There was someone I always looked up in any situation. In a more appropriate manner it can be said HE was with ME in my every mood, every joy, every sorrow, every success, and every failure. HE used to be a part of me in every thought & activity of mine. Suddenly HE was gone. Without whom I couldn’t have imagined my existence, HE was gone. HE is my DAD.

Suddenly some curse fell upon me; I was compelled to be more mature, cleverer & more responsible. I just felt I was out of the track. No one was there to guide me, to compel me; to scold me & most importantly to LOVE ME.I had always been my FATHER`S GIRL.Everyone had sympathy for me & additionally burdened me with all their so called sentimental pressure.

I found no one to rely on. I just looked at my FAMILY (Mom, Sis & Bro) and something was groaning inside me. I don’t wanted people to sympathize me. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to realize the reason behind my groaning pain that I was undergoing . Was it for the loss of DAD or was I afraid of the whole circumstance? I just couldn’t understand. I was so immature!!

Being the eldest what should be done by me; was my first thought. I felt awkward. I have never reflected my life in this way before. I was pushed in darkness by the DESTINY to find the lights for not only myself but the people surrounding me. I felt I was lost.

Practically I started moving on, looking for a job. But in the heart I still stood at the verge of my extinction of my childhood & my childhood moaning at my father`s death. I was the most mature person from there on. I stood at planks of life maintaining the balance between the job, studies, family, relatives & so much other responsibilities. Something in me made me more & more determined & I was fighting every odd to reach my father`s dream – COMPANY SECRETARY.

Ultimately I reached my goal, my destiny. I CLEARED OFF MY FINALS. Was I satisfied? I gave the news of crossing the first milestone to everyone. Still I felt my success to be incomplete. I wanted to shout out my HEART…wanted HIM to know that “YES DAD, I HAVE DONE IT….!! I HAVE DONE IT FOR YOU.”